Pssst, There’s Snot in the Brownies!

Each year Seattle Hempfest fights a weird battle, the battle of unauthorized vending. As a 100% volunteer driven event, we are  dependent upon revenue generated by the vendors who pay to sell their wares at our event. These vendors, along with your donations, are the life’s blood of Seattle Hempfest that keeps our heart tokin’and our vision rollin’ along.


When you fill your backpack up with little pipes, jewelry you’ve made, or even worse; brownies or other food you intend to sell, you’re really hurting Hempfest. It hurts our vendors, without whom there would be no Seattle Hempfest. When they have to compete with some guy who is not supporting the cause but instead siphoning potential revenue away from the vendors, they lose money. When they lose, Hempfest loses too.


It’s weird to be the ganja food police at Seattle Hempfest but we find ourselves in that position. Who’d of thunk? We realize that not everyone has access to delicious edible treats but when you buy a brownie out of some guys backpack you really are taking a risk.


A few years back we heard a rumor that people ate brownies dosed with heroin at Seattle Hempfest and ended up in Harbor View. Thank the ganja gods that it was just a rumor but it really snapped us up to the reality that hey, you DON’T know what you are buying from some dude in a park, and wow what a health risk this backpack brownie business is.


Not to mention, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen someone busted selling brownies at Fest, back stepping about how there’s not even any cannabis in the brownies. Pisses me off even more! Now you’re admitting to selling bunk in our event?


The health department actually requires each of our real food vendors to have a health permit and follow safety guidelines to assure that no one gets sick. If someone does get sick they can say what food booth they ate at verses some random guy selling bunk brownies with snot and e-coli in them spreading his ass wiped handmade diarrhea food at will making YOU sick.


What to do? I know you want delicious brownie goodness to enjoy while at fest. Hell, so do I! The time is now, talk to your friends. Know anyone that cooks? Bring your own ganja goodness with you. Feel free to be as civilly disobedient as you please – with your own supplies. It’s actually an enhanced felony to sell cannabis or cannabis foods in a park, receiving them is, as well.


I’m tellin’ you folks, it’s just not worth the risk. I’ll take my brownies without the snot please.

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  1. Greg Logan says:

    That’s the deal – we need to keep it real. Do HF the way the organizers intend – that is basic respect!!

    This isn’t a wink and not deal. No more cookie dough!

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